hanging on for dear life…

Image

This is what I see

I wanted to write a short story based on this picture, but I lacked the courage! I noticed the couple first, then the graffiti, then wondered what the buildings were further down the street, are they shops? They certainly look inviting, whatever they are. Then I looked at the couple again, but then I looked away, as in embarrassment,  as though I was staring at something private. To me they look like they are clinging on for dear life, time has stopped, all they are aware of is each other.

Gate-crashing a private moment

I haven’t ever felt like this… not as fully anyway. Somewhere near it recently, though not the real deal, as the feelings have faded. I cannot get the picture of the couple out of my head. It was some time before I noticed the ground they were on was actually steps. They almost look pretty. I briefly wondered how long it would take me to descend them, if I passed the couple. I can’t shake the feeling of looking in on a private moment. It’s almost a PDA (Public display of affection. I HATE PDA’s, for the record.) Everyone else in the picture looks as though they are going about their business, tourists on the other side, deciding where to go, what do first. Still I cannot forget about the couple.

The picture makes me…

Looking at them makes me feel wistful. A bit wistful that I wish I had what they have, but mostly because more than one friend I considered myself close to has recently found The One and with the exception of one, haven’t seen the other for ages. They were, are, friends I relied on partly because they’re ace and I loved them to bits, partly because they were sympathetic to my semi-housebound state and would visit gladly, and often.I’m having to readjust my feelings, make other friends, find other ways of coping. Does that mean I relied on them too much? This doesn’t necessarily mean I am lonely, it just means I miss them, LOADS. When I wrote about my friends last year, two of them were most definitely in that group. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy for them, I absolutely am. Which I why i am leaving them all alone for the most part, to get on with it, and missing them from a distance. Sometimes, I leave a voice-mail, and sometimes I suggest meeting. Mostly, it doesn’t help with missing them, but hoping this feeling will fade. Of course, I’m also hoping it’s my turn one day, as I wrote in an earlier post. For now, I will let the people in this picture get on with their day, and I will go back to mine, leaving the couple in the picture to enjoy their embrace in peace.

p.s. It also makes me want a holiday somewhere in Western Europe. Definitely time to go back to my day!

This post is in answer to the ‘Weekly Writing Challenge’. If this picture inspires you, why not write your own post, I’d love to read it!

When I get to Heaven…

When I get to heaven, what will I see? Who will I see? Where will I be, and who will I want to talk to first? The first bit’s easy of course. There is only one face to look for, to see out, and when I see Him to fall flat on my face. “My child, he will say… at last, we meet”. Many times, I came oh so close, but You decided I wasn’t ready. The time You call me though, then I will be ready, perfectly ready, then I truly will be home. No more watching, waiting, wondering, just peace, and rest, and joy. For all I don’t know what I will see, I know there will be lots of light, and air, and space, lots of joy and laughter, and yes, I imagine there will be singing, of course, hymns of praise to Jesus, for without Him we would all be lost. This is the place that He had gone before us to prepare. I don’t believe though that all we’ll do is float on clouds all day and sing. No, I reckon there will be far more to heaven than that. Busyness, and industry, lots of work to be done. Everyone will have His or Her own job to do. Finally, I will be able to work, I will have a purpose only I can fill, just like here, but I will finally have the energy to work.

Not only will I work, but there will be nothing my new body cannot do. I will not walk, I will run in freedom for the first time. Not only will I walk, I will dance. Not a waltz, not a two-step, but jive and quick step and tango, keeping up with every step, no pain, only joy. No need to coax my body into even one of the steps. It will just know what to do, fluidly and fluently, in perfect time to the music. Oh there will be music, of course there will be. Every kind and type of instrument and type of music you can think of. I bet I know who will be heading up the orchestra and leading the dancing: King David!

You and me, Jesus, finally we get to dance. Dancing, twirling, twirling, as though no-one was watching, (as the song goes…) Me, beautiful, wearing the finest dress… once had to cover all scars, bags and wheels, and now all of that is no more. Gone, in an instant, the second before I left the earth. You only see me. Created, as I am, in your image.  You and me, nothing else matters. Crown on my head, and jewels on my writs, sparkling as we dance, twinkling in the light

I see only what matters. All around me is vivid. The dewy grass, beauty all around me, the space, the air, the sun. People all around us joining in, even people who before, had never walked, even imperfectly, or who had lost the ability to. All restored to how You intended it. It will never rust, spoil or fade. And all of it will all be worth it! So very, very worth it.

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Witten for the “Weekly writing challenge“, and adapted from an earlier post.

an epistolary blog post…

there's nothing quite like receiving a hand-written letter... but there's no love lost between Sleepy and Awake and Smiley...
there’s nothing quite like receiving a hand-written letter… but there’s no love lost between Sleepy and Awake and Smiley…

I’m laying aside the most awake part of myself where I post from the first person. I don’t always do that, as I sometimes link to news articles or features and write my opinions on them. Mostly though I tend to write about things that happen in my week, things that have happened in the past or things I think and feel. However, this week’s writing challenge is all to do with “shifting perspective  so I have chosen the intermediate level, to write letters from one part of myself to the other. All should become clear…

Dear Sleepy

Sometimes I like you. On those rare occasions when you show up at just the right time, and stay with me all night long, never stirring once. Then you leave, just as I’m fully refreshed and ready to face the world, round about once every month The rest of the time, you show up too often with your mates Pain-full and Migraine and I long to send u packing.

Today’s one of those middling days where I can just about cope, You sent me into dreamless sleep the minute the morning routine was over, and I only just woke up in time to get ready to go out to Social Enterprise. I stayed awake while I was there without even one yawn. Lots of giggles, stories and silliness, what’s not to love. Best of all, I got a shot on my favouite horse  For an added bonus I haven’t come home to find you’re vying for my attention.  I can feel you creeping up on me now. I am wondering when you will strike and just waiting for the crash. I’ve even eaten an extra slice of yummy sticky-sweet banana cake to keep you away (Shhh don’t tell the dietitian,she’ll be after me…)

may you stay away for a while

love awake and smiley.

Dear awake and smiley

What’s so great about being awake? Then you actually have to Do Things, and then you ignore me. Don’t worry, it will not be long before I come to torment you again. I love making you miss things. I steal whole chunks of time when you  need tobe doing Useful Things. And then when you do wake, you can’t get rid of me, because I’m still hanging around, ready to strike again at the first opportunity. I have the most fun when Pain-full and Migraine come along too. Three’s a crowd, and a crowd is enough people for a PAAARTY! Haven’t had one of those for  couple of weeks, maybe I should get planning…

I love showing up when you least expect me. I don’t like it when you plan cos it’s harder for me to show up then. I like surprises. I like those times when you just can’t rid of me, Over-time. Days and days of sleepy-ness, when I’m by your side no matter how hard you fight.

I’ve already got to you today. You were just up and ready, and then off you went back to bed. A whole hour and 15 minutes of dreamless slumber and half an hour of not-quite-awake. Now you’re wondering where I’m hiding and when I’m going to strike next. Bet you miss me…

Am off to plan that Party

love Sleepy

(P.S. would love to know what you think of this should you read it…!)

Grammar : the s…

Grammar : the scourge of my yoof As soon as I see the word ‘Grammar’, all I can think about is how much I have always struggled with it, and immediately feel a deep panic (or, a deep sense of panic?)  One of my most pertinent memories from school is when my French teacher bemoaned the lack […]

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