Reader Extraordinaire

Every superhero has an ‘origin’ story of how they came into being. If applied to myself, How did I begin to be a reader, and eventually a writer?

I have to say, I have loved this challenge, (last week’s Weekly Challenge from WordPress) as it’s one of the most interesting I have attempted. Some of the challenges, especially the daily ones, have become repetitive, thinking about how I began to devour books, and my faltering beginnings as a writer has brought back lots of memories, though not always good ones. Part of the challenge was not simply to answer the eight questions suggested by the writer of the prompt but to put together a tale. Predictably, my notes grew exponentially as I answered each question, never being one to be succinct. My mum said recently ‘why write in 2 what you can write in 22, eh?’

When I told this to a friend who works in fundraising, she laughed and said when they present a pitch to organisations and the like for funding they are told the complete opposite. I am so relieved I am a writer and not a fundraiser, I’d never manage it! Proving this to be true, I’ve had to split this post into two, with the second part scheduled for Wednesday.

Reading was my very favourite hobby

The image shows two young, pretty, blonde-haired little girls sitting close together, with a book on their knees which they are reading together.
The image shows two young, pretty, blonde-haired little girls sitting close together, with a book on their knees which they are reading together. image credit: Horton Web Design (view the website at: http://www.HortonGroup.com

Growing up, I do not remember which books were read to me as a small child. I have lots of early, disability, special nursery and school related memories, but not of books read at bedtime, or other times. Wondering if that reflects differences of experience rather than being a reflection on my upbringing. My mum especially must have read to us lots as she was the one at home with my brother and I.

I remember very clearly being assessed by the Educational Psychologist on reading and maths ability because of my disability, and even at age 7, I remember my reading age being ahead of my actual age. I loved that, I was so pleased… as were my family. It was something that was good progress that was not related to my disability, but showed I had some intellectual ability, especially as I was thought have such a level of learning difficulties when I was born that they questioned whether I could finish primary school, but this proved to be the start of dispelling those fears. (My parents say I was always a couple of years behind my peers in maths though.)

Writing for children wasn’t yet ‘cool’!

Enid Blyton – Classic or Controversial?

The first books I remember reading by myself at home were written by Enid Blyton. Someone gave me ‘The Enchanted Wood’ trilogy for Christmas or a birthday. Now her books are controversial, as some consider them racist. I remember names like ‘Fanny’, ‘Dick’, and ‘Moonface’. I remember the biscuits full of honey which exploded in your mouth, (perhaps an early warning of my sweet tooth!) The tales of faraway lands fuelled my young imagination, though. I was never interested in the Famous Five, oddly, even though I was interested in adventure in other stories. I read the ‘Malory Towers’ books, by Enid Blyton, I think there were several in the series, the main characters a girl called Darrell who goes off to boarding school called (handily!) Malory towers. I read also some of the later books which featured Darrell’s younger sister Felicity. Again, these books were a reflection of the time in which they were written, though for me this was part of the charm.

Roald Dahl – Prolific engaging and inspiring writer or dark and dangerous?

I remember some of the books I read at school too, around the same times as I read lots of Enid Blyton’s books. We read Charlie and the Chocolate Factory in primary four, on which we were to write a story using our imaginations to dream up an amazing factory. Unfortunately I got side-tracked, writing ten A4 jotter pages of rubbish. I think we possibly read George’s Marvellous Medicine too, both books by Roald Dahl. I remember too the following year reading Danny the Champion of the World, (Roald Dahl again!!) and Stig of the Dump (Clive King). I must have loved them to remember them over 20 years later.

I went on to read other Roald Dahl books including The B.F.G and Matilda. I remember feeling sorry for both Sophie, the orphan whose life changes when she meets the BFG, and Matilda, who learns to read long complex books from age of four, while sitting in the library, the only place she feels safe. She is also famous for being able to move objects with her eyes, which she uses to her advantage, both with her dysfunctional family and draconian head teacher Miss Trunchbull. I think it was one of the first books I borrowed from a library. I remember numerous trips to the local library, though I do not remember the titles of what I read, just snippets of books.

Classics versus Contemporary

When I was about 11 or 12 I think, Mum wanted me to start reading classics. It would have been good preparation for high school, and University too. However, what I read, and Mum wanted me to read differed widely. I wanted to read what she considered rubbish, namely The Baby Sitters Club and Sweet Valley High.

Children’s literature has grown exponentially since I was young, thanks to the rise and rise of authors like Jacqueline Wilson, JK Rowling, Stephanie Myers and the likes. It would be fun to know what your memories are of reading as a

child especially, too, or maybe there was some other hobby you excelled in?

(P.S. Stay tuned for part 2 on Wednesday this week which will be live at 6am if I remember to schedule it….)


This post was written in response to last week’s Weekly Challenge from WordPress:

Every superhero has an ‘origin’ story of how they came into being. If applied to myself, How did I begin to be a reader, and eventually a writer.

To have a go yourself, click on the blue link directly above this.(or shift + tab and press space if using screen reader)I’d love to read your story! I do read others posts for hours at a time.

 


 

fifteen on Friday: people who make ‘snap’ decisions

Fifteen on Friday is a space where I write about something related to my experience of disability and illness. It stems from ‘five-minute Friday when I followed prompts set by the originator of the site, and I do this with her blessing. It takes me fifteen minutes often, to type what others would type in five, usually just because I get so tired!

They don’t know me like I do…

This week, it’s a subject that really riles me, and so I will do my best not to rant. I should acknowledge as well, that I do this too, though I shouldn’t, given how annoyed I get when people do it to me. So what is it that so annoys me? I can’t stand people making ‘snap’ decisions based on a snippet of information, or on how I look, specifically snap decisions on the severity or lack thereof, of my disability, or that I ‘look’ healthy, so I am healthy, which just drives me mad. Someone else said recently that ‘I hide being ill very well!’ I think so too!

It would be a lot easier to say, ‘I know the truth, and it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks’, but I’ve always cared. My friend known as ‘Chronic Rants’ blogged how it bugs her people always have to see the negatives in new treatments she tries, or tell her horror stories of how it went wrong for their friend’s friend, their mother, or who ever. Again, people making snap judgements based on a little information. Chronic Rants admits she does it, far too often. I do too. It still smarts when I am on the receiving end.

But you don’t look disabled!

If I am sat in a chair, or laid in a bed, I don’t ‘look’ disabled (nor would I want to). The irony is, neglect to take my cocktail of tablets and I look very disabled indeed, flailing about with arms and legs, shaking when I hold anything, doubled over in pain (which I often am even with the tablets). People see me looking ‘normal’ therefore and think ‘her disability is not that bad’ and voice it. I’ve even had a consultant pummel my arm years ago trying to find a vein, with me almost in tears ‘what’s wrong?’ he says.

‘My arm hurts a lot, cos I have cerebral palsy’

He says, incredulously, ‘You have cerebral palsy? Nobody told me (no surprise there!) But you don’t look like you have cerebral palsy’.

He’s not the only one. Nurses have made me walk because I don’t look disabled enough to need a hospital wheelchair, so I’d only have to walk the wee bit to the taxi) and others have asked ‘But how do you manage at home?’ Erm… that’s the point (of asking for help) I don’t. I have invisible disabilities, but I also have a physical disability that looks invisible in certain situations… weird!

However, they don’t see the exhaustion after a few steps, the physio does, or the pain shooting down my legs from trying to stay upright with a Zimmer frame after said steps. They don’t see all the things I can’t do that I have to ask ‘sidekicks’ to do, while wishing I didn’t have to ask so often. They don’t see me doubled over in pain, the professionals in and out of my flat, be they joint care manager, agency manager, nurses, ‘sidekicks’, other nurses for appointments, and house visits from doctors when I can’t even make it down a street or two to the surgery.

Yes, I know, I should put the violins away now!! I am thankful that I can talk (though others may not be when I just don’t shhhh!!), I have an electric wheelchair to get about (though it doesn’t fit in taxis — another story!) and I can move my arms and legs enough to do some things (eat, drink, choose lighter weight products in the supermarket, drive my wheelchair (badly…!) and so on.

It’s something I have to live with, but that will continue to bug me! I guess we all have pet hates like that!

Age, not just a number…

Milestones, done differently…

I have a pretty good idea of which milestone I reached at which age, from talking to my parents over the years, from photographs or from my own memories. I was late to start walking and talking for example, though I’ve not stopped talking since. I was 5 or 6 when I put my crutches in the back of the wardrobe, and didn’t look back until I need a mobility scooter aged 18 at university.

I was 12 or 13 when I started worrying about boys, though wondered if anyone would ever be interested in me. I remember well the love letters from a boy called Danny when I was 14, who moved away shortly after, but I don’t think of him as my first proper boyfriend. However, by ‘proper boyfriend’ I mean someone that I really, really loved. That only happened last year, just before my 30th birthday. Things like that make me feel old, especially when I consider that by 25, my Mum had two children, effectively two babies, because of my level of need. I wonder now if I’ll ever meet someone, or even if I need to.

Babies everywhere, but not mine!

I don’t know whether I ever thought I would be married with children by this stage or not. I think my mum would say the former. I am more and more aware of my age as more friends get married and/or have children. Even the friends who like me were waiting to meet someone are now married. I’ve got to the stage where I can be genuinely happy for them, meeting up with a close friend and her baby regularly, who I adore. Also, Sunday school will have exploded in numbers in a few years. I love that I’ll still have contact with lots of children because of church. It’s funny, no way would I have said that before I got my electric wheelchair, but it somehow makes me more approachable to most children, and has helped me be much more comfortable talking to them. I am more at their height I guess, and some kids are fascinated by what the chair can do, or the golf ball controller.

Am I always defined by the number I am?

Recently, someone told me I ‘look good for 30’! A backwards compliment, for sure! I definitely don’t feel 30. Some days I feel old, when the routine of care and the sameness of every day gets me down. Other times, I feel young and insecure as though I were a school kid again… usually when something goes wrong in the house and I don’t know what to do.

I might like to do Uni over again, with carers to do personal care, and PA’s to help with library access and so on, as I didn’t have care until a couple of years ago, and no PA till third year. I wish I had been strong enough to ask for these helps though and been able to concentrate my limited energy wholly on my studies. I don’t think I realised I was entitled, or thought my disability was ‘bad enough’ even though tiny things sapped my energy. It’s so easy to say ‘what if’ and ‘if only’ though… almost everyone must have some regret about something. I was so intimidated by everything too, fearful, and never feeling like I was ‘good enough’ to be there… I guess that is where some mature students have the edge. Do I wish I were a different age though? Probably not, unless I had more confidence to with it.

My Grandparents, examples of how to age!

On a slightly different tack, thinking about age makes me think of my three grandparents, who are 78, 76, and 88. Generally they all keep in fairly good health and all have active lives. They are amazing, and definitely defy stereotypes of ‘elderly people’. I hope I am like them when I am older. All of them look young for their age. My Gran recently came to visit, and someone asked how only she was. When I told them, their jaw dropped in shock, and they said how strong and healthy she seemed for her age.

In some ways it is easy to tell they’ve got much older (for example, my granddad has two hearing aids, but he is 83) I don’t remember him having any health problems at all until a few years ago. Trouble is, aside from Gran’s diabetes, I have more health problems than them all put together!! Maybe I am the aged one?!

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I used the ‘Weekly Writing Challenge‘ prompt from March 10th, as inspiration to get me writing again. The prompt asked what age meant to each blogger. Above is what it means to me… but what does it mean to you? Why not have a go at your own post on ‘Golden Years’ and aging in general? (Click on the link in the sentence above to see the prompt) I’d love to read it!

The one with the Hospital…

I do so hate all these absences from my writing. This time, it’s because I was in hospital. I am still in hospital, actually, just writing this from my room as my lovely Mum got mobile Internet sorted out. I am likely to be in for another 2 weeks at least so it is safe to say you can expect more blog posts. I do however, have to catch up with promises I made to write guest posts, and write the reflection on the Holy Spirit a minister asked for. At times if feels overwhelming, though not as much as when I was in my flat feeling shattered and wondering over it all.

It is easier to cope with things in hospital in some ways, because my parents are the ones watching my post and helping with paperwork and so on. My friends come and offer a very welcome distraction from the (sometimes) mind-numbing boredom. All I have to do is concentrate on two things; my relationship with Jesus, and getting better. Thankfully, I am getting better, though I did have entirely separate week-long stints in the High Dependency Unit after the first emergency operation and Intensive Care Unit after the second. Doctors are amazed I have come this far given what I have been through, but my Gran’s friend was right when she said God obviously still has a purpose for my life and work for me to do. After all, despite what society thinks, it is God who gives life, and God who takes it away.

I have had excellent care during this hospital stay, though it hasn’t always been easy. There have been times I have had to shout loudly to get the help I need with basic tasks such as washing and dressing, or cutting up food. People kept asking “and how do you manage at home?” Over and over, I’d say, I don’t, I have carers in three or four times a day. It reinforced negative feelings of not being good enough because I could not look after myself, which prompted me to speak up. This time I knew I had to ask for help to make my needs known. Once that happened I felt more comfortable around the ward. I did however raise the issues with an appropriate person. A bit unusual for me. I didn’t want others with multiple impairments to straggle as I had. One dept. generally focuses on their own issue to the exclusion of all else, which usually works fine, except in complex cases like mine.

 I’m on a ward again but in a side room, where nurses wear yellow aprons and purple gloves so no infection is passed from them to me or from me to them. Anyone with a cold or a bug has so far been sensible enough to stay away or keep their distance. As a friend said, anyone who visited me while ill, would likely leave me suffering with whatever they had, (as my immune system is so low) while being stuck within four walls (as I must not leave my room and mix with other patients, (again for infection risk) which would me absolutely miserable, on top of everything else – yuck!!

When I do get home, it may not be straightforward, as a different care agency will be assisting me. It was about time I moved… with everything that went on before. For now though I have to eat properly so the wound has enough calories to help it heal. (I have no skin on my tummy, because it’s just an open wound. However, the surgeon and his team have saved my life so I can’t grumble. It will heal in time. I’m off for a nap before the lovely domestic team are round with breakfast in an hour. 

Fifteen on Friday: lunchtime

image shows tray laden with utensils and ingredients needed to make lunch
The image shows a wooden tray with a beanbag underneath and a sticky dycem mat (blue in colour) on the top of the tray. On the tray is a large container of butter, a tin of mushrooms in sauce, red spatula, metal butter knife, ring-top pull-roll handle (blue in colour) and a loaf of bakery bread

What’s so special about lunchtime?

At first glance, you may think my chosen topic a little odd… after all what does lunch have to do with a fifteen minute type-for-all, on disability? Given the effort this simple meal takes someone like me to make, and the resulting spasms, muscle contractions and exhaustion, the side effects of filling my tummy with food are severe. Take one day this week …

Shattered, and in pain, I trundled home from a five-minute journey to the village hall, picking my way over the bumps in the pavement so as not to jar my back, all the while scouting for various landmarks, crossing islands and sloping pavements that help me keep my bearings. Collapsing in my chair as I kicked the front door shut as hard as I could with my foot, I scanned various options in my mind while painfully tearing off scarf and coat.

First prize for effort?

Trying and failing to open a ring pull can of garlic mushrooms I had slapped on the counter, I grabbed the can and flipped it over, needing several goes before I could get the tin open and the side of the can to connect. Twisting it open, and scooping out the contents into a pan with help of trusty bendy spatula, I twisted on the heat. Unfortunately I had clapped eyes on that morning’s dishes, remembering the carer had run out of time. I eventually managed them in my own unique way rinsing off copious amounts of bubbles as I went, legs contracting with the effort of using my arms. Finally done (or so I thought) I grabbed and tipped the side of the basin with my good hand, pouring a third of it over my lap as I did so. Grabbing a tea towel, I mopped my lap, the sink and the sides of the units as best I could, throwing the tea towel in the wash basket, and turning my chair in the direction of the bread. Throwing two slices on my lap, I drove to the toaster and used a lot of effort reaching to place the bread and push the slider down the toaster. Bread only half in the toaster, I flipped it round as best I could to cook the other half, stirring the almost overcooked mixture as I went.

The end is nigh…

Grabbing a big plate from the draining rack, grateful not to have to try to stand and reach for one from the big cupboard above the over, I pushed myself up with all my might, clinging on to the unit at the side of me. Wobbling away, I grasped the toast and flipped it on the plate, near-falling as I did so. Shoving the plate on my knee and slapping it on the unit next to the butter, I liberally scooped and spread butter on my toast, the plate, and the unit, tipping the mushroom mixture on my plate with the spatula.

Ignoring the pan for now, I grabbed my beanbag tray, with handy dycem, slapped the plate on it, and balanced in precariously on my knee tipping it towards the floor as I did so. Tearing at chunks of toast with an adapted fork while steadying it with a sharp knife I eventually managed to eat my lunch, smearing it over the tray, my face, and my lap in the process.  Eating done, I repeated the dish doing, lap soaking process and drove straight for the lukewarm coffee I made at the beginning of the process, slugging it down gratefully.

Now? NAP TIME!!

 

 

2013 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2013 annual report for sat n’ all that, with some surprising results, which you can read for yourself below:

Here’s an excerpt:

A New York City subway train holds 1,200 people. This blog was viewed about 4,800 times in 2013. If it were a NYC subway train, it would take about 4 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

One day, one post had over 300 views, and many more on other days. One of my highlights of 2013, for sure. Other highs and lows of 2013, as posted on my FB page today include:

two new hair colours, pierced my nose, turned 30, had the most amazing party with wonderful friends and family, (lots of whom made special efforts to be there) fell deeply in love for the first time but had my heart truly broken, learned all over again what it is to trust God with an unknown future, learned how fantastic some of my fabulous friends are, had an exciting Skype conversation with an establish Christian author who thinks my writing is “fantastic”, learned all sorts about myself… faults too, and made constructive goals for 2014… going forward with my hand in the hand of the One who loved me and gave his life for me…

Here’s to the hope of a new year, going forward in faith with joy and peace, showing God’s love to all who cross our path. Glory be to God’s amazing grace, of which I shall write of in this coming year, with many more topics besides! Thank you for sticking with me, and let’s raise a glass to all that’s to come in 2014!

Fifteen on Friday (2): The Battle Within

About this time last year, I published a short blog post which still makes me smile, about the conflict I have between two different parts of me, the ‘awake’ part, and the ‘sleepy’ part. They often fight each other, leaving me in the middle, feeling dazed, exhausted, and in varying degrees of pain. This affects at least part of every day, if not whole days, maybe whole weeks, and at times, weeks at a time.

This fight has been responsible for many of the absences from writing this year, as even if I am just about awake my ability to think clearly, process information, or form what I want to write or speak is markedly slower and much more frustrating. Countless posts have been begun and lost this way, or even begun in my head before sleep takes over. When I wake, only fragments are left, if I remember what I wanted to write. It’s hard to even begin to explain my frustration or the effect these things have on my life or even all the ways it affects me. Medication, stress, current pain, spasms and disrupted sleep all play a part. A therapist once argued that I don’t have ‘fatigue’ as such, it is merely effects of underlying factors such as pain, and medication side effects coupled with the huge effort it takes me to do anything. I beg to differ, given the devastating effect it can have on my life; but I digress.

Though very rare, sometimes I win the battle. This week I managed to get to church, and stay for the buffet lunch, catching up with several friends I have not managed to communicate with for weeks. Monday was another much-loved hydrotherapy session, and Tuesday, Christmas eve, brought welcome rest. I did have plans, but by this time, pain from all the exertion had taken over and I could battle no longer, being put to bed, and asleep by 8pm. Wednesday, Christmas day, dawned bright, clear and sunny. This special day involved a lift to church and a trip to Social Enterprise, for Christmas dinner, presents and games. In part, I am there because I am on my own, but I am also there as a befriender and listener to those for whom Christmas day brings back untold painful memories and heartache. I had the privilege of listening to/ talking with several people. It is this kind of ‘work’ which makes me feel very alive, and causes me to feel ‘good’ tired, or tired for very good reasons, reasons of my choosing, and not for fatigue. I played Wii games too which I love. I can be competitive and have a fighting spirit in in the extreme; part of what allows me to accomplish anything I do manage, and helps me to persevere through the tired, painful times.

Thursday brought Brunch out with lovely friends, though by this time the fatigue was definately winning. Once home, I had several hour long naps and never really woke up, sleeping brokenly overnight in-between spasms and pain, and causing me to feel apprehensive about another day on the go. This time, to meet up with family for a meal. I loved it, though felt I was much quieter than I can often be. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I resent it because anything I did try to say was an effort and not feeling that well spoilt it a little, though I enjoyed it inspite of everything. Once home, I spent some time with my family before they left early to try to beat the bad weather home. Since then I have drifted in and out of naps, falling into deep dreamless sleep for an hour at a time after supper too. I guess it is good in part as it has allowed me to write this… though frustrating, as I think of all the things outstanding which have been sat these weeks, writing included. In an attempt to focus on the positive things, once I finish writing, I will be very glad I managed it… though I hope for many more times in this coming year in which I, accompanied by Jesus, win this very frustrating of battles.

Care, employment and families – big week for disability

Trust the Government to squish debates on such big issues into the last week in the hopes not as many MP’s will attend / notice / care. As usual, as mentioned by Scope, the numbers of people now not qualifying for care, and therefore having little or no help to prevent a health or care crisis such as a hospitalisation, means the cost to taxpayer escalates despite attempts to save money. Typical Government too, to underestimate how much money good, ‘preventative’ social care costs.

Also, it has not been mentioned here that cuts to disability living allowance -500,000 less people are eligible or will lose out when assessed for it’s replacement. This matters, because the people not eligible for social care might have had the funds to pay for something, at least, but will now have no plan B, surely increasing demand on all fronts. Also, people eligible for social care could previously use their Disability Living Allowance to ‘top-up’ their care, though for many, once assessed for PIP, their benefit amount will be less, if eligible at all, and therefore a further gap in funding exists. The only funding which ‘tops up’ the gap a little is that after several attempts, the Government were unable to close the Independent Living Fund, used to pay for care for those people judged most severely disabled, after the decision was quashed by a last-ditch appeal attempt. However, as this money goes to a relatively small number of people, there is still a massive shortfall. Yet again, the Government has failed to understand how difficult, and complex life can be when you are sick and/or disabled, and just to be seen on a par with your peers requires significant mental and physical energy, and considerable extra costs (phoning ahead, transport, planning for toilet stops, meals, medication… heck, just getting up and dressed even with help, can be beyond me some days!! Those who are able to be on a par with ‘normal people’ in the workplace, in home-life, and comminity life can, and should be given this support — yes, perhaps at quite a big cost. However, to not plough money into it will cost something greater — physical and mental health of sick and/or disabled people will deteriorate costs health and social care systems more in the longterm, and especially where there is also increased pressure and stress from wrong benefit / tribunal decisions too, lives.

New Directions : Introducing ‘Fifteen on Friday’

‘Fifteen on Friday’

I am relieved to be writing again after a hiatus of some weeks. Several times, I have begun posts but been unable to finish them. Often on a Friday I would look up the ‘Five Minute Friday’ prompt, write that, and then share it with others who have written on the same thing. However, I have written here for well over a year now save a couple of longer absences for illness I was unable to work through. Owing to another of these absences, it’s some weeks since I had an immensely helpful Skype chat with writer and blogger Robin Norgren about the direction she thinks this blog should be heading in.

Together, we came up with a plan, We decided, that as the ‘Five minute Friday’ prompts took me fifteen minutes to write the same length of text as other writers wrote in five, we came up with Fifteen on Friday, focusing on some aspect of life with a disability, with Lisa-Jo Baker’s blessing (the creator of ‘five-minute Friday). My first subject is one of my favourite hobbies, and one of my favourite ways to exercise save for horse-riding. It is a mix of swimming and physiotherapy exercises, hence the name hydrotherapy.

A snapshot captured in words: hydrotherapy

The air is still, and close, humid in fact. Those on the side-lines slowly swelter, though those who have luxury of the warm soothing water delight in its caress. The only sounds are of chatter, between those on the side-lines or those in the water, and sometimes between the two. There is one, however, who is perfectly still other than when disturbed by others around her. Still, though by no means emotionless …

Slowly, sore tired muscles begin to relax in the warmth, as joints old before their time are unusually buoyant, helped of course by two cylinder-shaped multi-coloured floats (‘noodles’).  Breaths become deeper, slowly exhaling the stress of the week, and inhaling the still warm air. Joy begins to seep in, from one pore to the other until eventually, all else is forgotten but the gentle rhythm of the water, allowing the person in the middle to bob gentle up and down, unfurling piece by piece. Sometimes, the air is punctuated by laughter.

The bit in the middle is the hard work, kicking, stretching, moving stiff joints, until the last five minutes are free to relax the same way as in the first five, floating gently and calmly… the last final gasp of warmth and joy. All too soon it is over, with just 20 minutes time allowed. Off for all the hassle of changing and the banter of lunch in the café before heading home to chores, errands and the day to day things. Until next time…

Five-Minute Friday: Tree

This picture shows the tree I can see from my kitchen window. Though it has lost lots of leaves I can still see l lots of different shades of red and orange.
This picture shows the tree I can see from my kitchen window. Though it has lost lots of leaves I can still see l lots of different shades of red and orange.

As soon as I saw the word ‘tree’ I thought of two in particular. The first, the magnificent tree I can see from a window in my kitchen, resplendent in all the colours of autumn with just enough leaves left to show off. The other tree, the fig tree in Scripture, and of which I was reminded recently while reading Christina Schofield’s story, My Life and Lesser catastrophes, beginning with the motorcycle crash which shattered  Christina and Allen’s marriage, ministry and family as they had known it, and in its place, was trauma, uncertainty, hardship, and disability. One day, while Christina is reflecting on the caregiving challenge presented by her husband’s paralysis, God gently reminds her of the fig tree in Habakkuk 3: 17.

Though the fig tree does not bud

and there are no grapes on the vines,

though the olive crop fails

and the fields produce no food,

though there are no sheep in the pen

and no cattle in the stalls,

18 yet I will rejoice in the Lord,

I will be joyful in God my Savior (My Life and Lesser Catastrophes, kindle edn. P 317).

Each of us, if we are Christians, regardless if we face horrendous circumstances, or perhaps especially if we do, still have the same requirements on us as others, for example to choose to find joy in God and what he has done for us, to be thankful for the gifts he has given us and to find our strength in Him rather concentrating on the hardships we face and then trying to fight on our own. If we do, we are sure to lose.

I found I had much in common with Christina and her husband. For instance, it is easy to become bogged down in the monotony of day to day life, especially when faced with significant disability, as it takes so much energy just to get through each day, leaving little inclination or energy for travel, life does not vary much, as it revolves around routine by necessity, and there may not be much, if any money left over from benefits (or disability pension) for distractions and luxuries once the extra costs of being disabled are met in part or whole. We do though, have the constancy and companionship of Jesus, and the strength that only comes from Him, which is exactly what we do need. In our lack, we have plenty. I am thankful to God for such a vivid reminder of these things. I am off now, to see how many different colours I can find in the other tree, the one out the kitchen window. Until next week…

N.B. This post was written for Five Minute Friday. Why not have a go yourself? I’d love to read it!